What’s Holding You Back? And What To Do If It’s You.

Your success will come down to the opportunities you pursue and what you’re prepared to do – even when its hard and you’re uncertain.

Easier said than done though, right?

Is there something you’re holding off from saying or doing? Like, not giving the feedback, not saying what you think, not putting your hand up, or not taking the risk? So many people are wishing and hoping for the right time, the right words, the right way, or the right approach.What is holding off costing you, for example, in time, productivity, money, momentum or something else?

Every time you say you’re going to do something and then don’t, you strip away a little piece of your self-esteem and self-trust.

Success comes when you decide to give it your best shot. It’s not about looking good or getting it right. It’s about having a go with the belief that your effort and action is a positive step forward – even if the subsequent result isn’t one you like, want or expect.

You can do all the right things and still get it wrong. That’s life.

How do you get in your own way?

Our greatest victories are won not over circumstances or other people but over ourselves. Doug Grady

Our comfort zone is our safe haven for our (sometimes unconscious) patterns for how we make decisions that can result in us getting in our own way. Which of these four do you relate to the most?

1.      Self-doubt and fear 

We’re all worried whether we’re good enough. Does your self-doubt exceed your courage sometimes? E.g. What will they think? What if I stuff it up? What if I fail?

2.      Ego

We all have an ego – which shows up when we perceive the need to feel in control, to be right, to judge, and to get even. E.g. They didn’t offer help last time so why should I help now?

3.      Excuses

We find clever ways to: rationalise why things are the way they are; blame things that are external to us; and to let ourselves off the hook. E.g. It’s not the right time, I’m too busy, They didn’t do their bit.

4.      Apathy

We tolerate the status quo even though we don’t like it E.g. It’s not that bad, Things could be worse, I can live with it a bit longer if I have to.

Here are three steps to get out of your own way and into the opportunity in front of you.

Step One: See it BEFORE you have it.

You’ve got to believe you can do it, that you have what it takes, and that you are worthy of the result of doing it. If you say you can’t, you won’t. Instead tell yourself that you must.

Step Two: Take ACTION

What separates people who succeed or not is the amount of action they are prepared to take. The only way to move through fear and past excuses is to tap into courage and get into action. Only when you are action can you feel and experience resilience.

Step Three: Make it about the LEARNING, not about you

You are not a victim. Don’t make it about you, or your worth. Instead, let go of how you judge your results and instead focus on: what you’re learning; how you’re making progress; and why it matters.

Bringing it all together

When you truly decide you will have the success you desire, and align your actions to that decision then the success will be yours. Everything else is a distraction when you let yourself get in your own way. Be positive and do the thing or take the next step – it will be worth it.

What is one thing you can do that will enable you to get out of your own way and into an opportunity in a way that enables you to be bigger, bolder and braver? I’d love to know.

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